I need to vent...NOW

I make fun of people. I admit that. But I don't freakin' blame things on people and then rub it in. And if I do, it's only because that person has done it first.

And just hanging around Tammy, Pearl, Trinity, Ashley, and Alexis..that happens ALL the time. Thank God Gina's not like that. But really? Really? Why always blame me if I don't make it on time, or if I don't know where I'm going. I'm not freakin' perfect, you know??? Why then, do they start saying things like, "Sharai never knows where she's going?" or "Yea, I always get lost when I'm with her" or "Sharai's always late for everything, totally ruins it for the rest of us." WHAT THE HECK???!!!! It PISSES ME OFF!! Which is why I get so quiet when it happens. YOU should know this by now. I'm quiet when I'm EXTREMELY MAD.

But no...The Sailor Scouts know EVERYTHING and just blame the one that isn't perfect. You know, I just feel like I need to let go of all of them. They're so quick to blame me for so much crap. ESPECIALLY Tammy. That girl seriously likes to be right all the time. ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME. I'm just wondering WHY? She's only a year older than me, and yet she thinks that she's wiser by decades. Arguing with her is like arguing with a rock. Immovable. Hard-headed. Oh, and WRONG.

I can't tell you how many times I've had to say, "Okay, you're right" to all of them. But have they told me that? Rarely. And if they do, it's like once in a blue moon and only when they feel like it. I've had it!!!!! What kind of friendship is that? Only one can be right all the time? Uhh, I don't think so.

And Trinity acts like such a freak sometimes. Yea, it's embarrassing, but I can handle that. I can't handle how she doesn't know when to stop. She's totally relentless, and that alone makes me question our friendship. She thinks so many things are hilarious, but they're really not. When she and Ashley switched their pictures, she thought it was just the funniest thing. Uh, no. It wasn't that funny. Actually, it wasn't funny at all. And when they start crackin' jokes on my height and whatnot, I tell them to stop. But do they? NO. They're joke-ho's I swear.

And no, I'm not PMS-ing you guys. I'm just fed up w/the crap you're all giving me. Tammy, just because you've driven me for almost 2 years, doesn't mean that I'm driving you for life. People have done things for me once, but those things were so life changing that I DO owe them. I owe you too, but I don't owe you my life.

Pearl and Alexis, you need to stop conforming to what people are saying. You start saying one thing, but then when confronted, you totally back out and change your story. That's just as bad as the crap everyone else is giving me.

Look, I'll probably just slough it off in the morning. But the feelings are still there. When it comes to it, I'm STILL pissed that you all act this way. That you treat me this way. Just LET IT GO. I'm not some emotional punching bag you can all beat on, just because I don't get angry so easily. Go easy on me, or just leave me alone. I can only tolerate stupidity and mediocre personalities for so long. Life is not always about laughter. It's not all about you. It's not all about partying, getting drunk, going out all the time, dancing, or whatever you think sounds fun. It's about being a real friend. Just listen to me sometimes. And if I don't know what I'm doing, just go with. Don't keep calling me out on it!!!!! As a friend, I don't want to always have to go out. I like staying put and just talk. Which is why Gina is probably the most amazing friend that I have. And if you think she's a bad friend, then piss off! This girl doesn't deserve me as a friend but she wouldn't tell you that. She's too good to backstab her friends that way.

So take a lesson from her. Or you can just get out of my life. Either way, you guys really need to change. I'm tired of changing for you.

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