More Than Me

Thinking back on these past few weeks, I can honestly say that I have never been so emotionally and physically drained.

I have been through a lot in my life, more than the usual teenager should experience...but I've always made it through with only a few scrapes here and there. However, this time is beyond anything I've had to go through. Once when I think it's going to get better, it gets worse. Put simply, I'm in quick sand and the only branches around me are snakes.

I'm just SO FRUSTRATED.

List of things that are currently making Sharai upset:

1) An ex-friend wants me to sign some promissory note that I have no intention of signing because of the sheer stupidity of the idea.

2) I owe money to EVERYONE. (ex-friend, church friend, even MOM.)

3) I actually thought this guy I met was in his 20s. He's 39, and I almost went out with him.

4) Keep thinking about said man. He was in my dreams a couple days ago.

5) I'm a slut for thinking about him.

6) I have no job, so there's no way for me to pay anyone back.

7) I can't drive.....YET.

8) My hormones are driving me CRAZY. All I've been thinking about is SEX. SEX. SEX. Not a good sign of a composed teenage female.

9) I have yet to pull through with my Pilates' workouts. I haven't looked good in a bikini since 9th grade.

10) I'm running from God. I know this. And for some reason, I don't care.

So there you have it. Story of my life. And I'm SICK of it.

If any of you are licensed Christian therapists/psychologistsm, PLEASE leave a comment. I need advice on how to cope with this before I spontaneously combust.

Seriously.

Sometimes I even see smoke coming out of my ears.

HELP ME.