Share the Ube.

Well..it's come to this. And all thanks to an empty promise and strategic lie, my mother told me. Now I'm in the hole $600, and I need $600 to give to my mother. Grrr....LIFE SUCKS doesn't it? BUT, I'm always optimistic, and I know God has a plan...somewhere for me. I just wish I could know what it is, you know? AGH, I need help. It's hard enough that I can't find a job because of my class schedule, now I owe money to people who actually owe ME. You see the utter confusion here?? Anyway, if anyone can lend me $600 right now, I promise to pay it back once I get my job. And it will be soon as I've been applying to LITERALLY all the stores, and venues and I'm bound to get something. Please comment if you can....I'm so desperate not even Ben & Jerry's can help me now.

I'm feeling really spontaneous today, so I'm gonna ask... Who's actually puked after watching a disgusting movie? Like, you just can't take any more of the nasty elements that the movie has. Because, I'll be honest, I've seen some pretty bad stuff...but it has never made me ever wanna lose my lunch. So, what is it about these movies that make people want to seriously puke? Do you guys do it on purpose? Or are you really puking because the movie's that disgusting? Or, if you really ARE like me, some things in life just wanna make you puke...nasty film not required? I'm just curious...since I read a puke-worthy synopsis for 120 Days of Sodom.

Okay, so I published that last post first to say a few things. I hate my life. That's it. Oh, okay. Haha, you lovable nosy people. If you ARE still reading this, bless your dearie hearts. Not a lot of people read this blog, and it's always a privilege to get some feedback once in a while. Anyway, this reason why life just sucks right now is because...well. I am a loser. That pretty much sums it up. I know I totally sound like a petty seven year old, and I can be. I'm much more rational than this, believe me! It's just getting harder every day. To deal with all my shortcomings. I know in God's eyes, I'm anything but that. Still, it's hard to live a life where opportunity and success don't exist. I've been stuck in this pitiful rut since the fourth grade. And this loser train I'm on is getting faster and faster with no hope of ever stopping. You know, I think I'm going to die of exasperation. Really. I'm sick of being here. Stu

So, there's this great book I'm reading right now. And I'm not just saying this because I'm a Christian and whatnot. This guy who wrote it...VERY good. He's not a snob like many Christians, intellectuals, philosophers, and theologians come across as. He's down to earth, but still maintains this presence. This authoritative character. His words on how people deal with pain and where pain comes from and why we have to go through it is beyond anything I've ever read before. I've read his other book, "Mere Christianity" and was also blown away. I'm not going to rant about how great it is. It's something you have to experience yourself. Seriously though!! This is real stuff here. After reading even a snippet of his work makes me want to delve into the Bible and study it even more. His observations are groundshaking and his insights continue to reach into my mind and make me believe even more. Simply put, it's a Read Or Die book.

okay. wow. I'm so giggly right now it's almost criminal. I feel so bad that my hormones are raging at this point, and that is exactly why I'm going to share with you!!!!! four words: Hideo. Muraoka. is. HOT. Seriously, LOOK THIS GUY UP!! I think I've hit an all time low in the area of total obsessive, lustful behavior. 'Cause he DEFINITELY takes the cake! I saw one of his modeling pictures, and (this is so wrong for me to say) literally, the room temperature went up like 30 degrees. All I'm going to say is that he's Brazilian and Japanese. WHAT AN AWESOME COMBO!!! haha okay, enough rambling. Here's a pic for all you droolers out there. Just be sure to have something to catch that drool because, believe me, he's a keeper. I've officially put him into my giggle box. And for those of you who are curious, just let me know and I'll post about it next time. As a clue, it's a box of pictures. haha have fun!

Artist Historian Banker Novelist University Professor Photographer Vet Paralegal Graphic Designer Online Content Developer Webmaster Producer Managing Director Nutritionist Advertising okay, so I took a test and here are some of my options for my career. Some of these are pretty good..others...ahhh. I'll let you guys figure that out. Haha. Anyway, if you know me pretty well, then feel free to let me know what you think!! If you don't know me at all...well. I don't know what to tell you haha.

Hmm, this day is turning out to be a REALLY bad one. I'm currently @ CSUN right now. Just found out that my service is suspended on my cell. My laptop is now at 18% battery power...and going... I have no ride. I'm cold. I'm tired. I want to sleep. I have no money. I need a job. Wow, this is pretty rock bottom for me. what to do. what to do.. ohhhps!! Now my battery is at 17% whoohoo... if anyone sees this distress signal for help.. well HELP!!!!!!!!! I'm sitting in Nordhoff Hall right now... near the Little Theatre. And I'm hungry and cold. *brrr* so help PLEASE!!!!

Well. Hmm, I don't quite know what to say at this point. My life is in the toilet. Literally and figuratively. I won't say much on here right now for fear of exploitation by some rather nasty people. Besides that. I've been thinking for a while. Maybe I'll quit choir. Maybe I'll quit the Passion Play. I don't belong there, you know? Looking at some people's expressions during rehearsal... or I guess I should say, knowing that they're looking at me, has caused me to make this decision. I just don't belong. I don't really want to talk about it specifically, but to whoever reads this, I'm sure you know what I mean. I should pick another ministry to help out in, huh? I know. I will. Sorry for making things hard on you guys. I'll be gone for a while. Work is hard to find. And right now, I need to make some cash. I'll still go to Shepherd every week. I just won't be involved for a long time. And when I do get involved

I. Can. Not. Believe. This. My own grandmother had a fall today. Under normal circumstances, a person who falls just gets back up and keeps going, right?? Well, my grandmother is NOT normal under ANY circumstances. When you're pushing 93, falling is anything BUT normal. But she got up with our help and kept going. Still, I'm really worried. I'm sitting behind her in the van right now and she keeps clutching her side The side on which she fell. And she's leaning...indicating that she's trying to avoid any pain. BUT I CANNOT BELIEVE SHE FELL ON MY WATCH!! This is ridiculous. I'm the saddest excuse for a grandkid. Seriously. Anyway, talk later. Goin' to church!!! YAY.